Monday, November 24, 2008

Day 2: Time for the deep stuff...

I am still pondering our Sunday morning HomeBuilders discussion....We read from Galatians 6:1-10. At first the discussion was interesting and yet I was not feeling like I could grasp the complete message that was being given us. The part of the chapter that resonates the most with me are verses 1-2. (For those of you like myself who are not so bible savvy here are the verses)

Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Galatians 6:1-2

So after reading these verses and rereading these verses I still do not feel that I am able to comprehend the true magnitude of so few words. I mean my mind is lead to question the different interpretations of these verses. The part the I question first is we are to "carry each other's burdens." I find that we can do this in a superficial sort of way when asking friends how there week has been or how their family is, but the true depth and weight of this comes from really getting into your friendships enough to know your friends hearts. When thinking about how many people I know, I am astounded (and somewhat ashamed) of how few I actually can say that I know enough to truely help carry their burdens.

After deeper contenplation of how few of my friends I really know, I was lead to ask myself "Why?" "Why do I not let myself really listen and share?" The answer is I am afraid to be vulnerable infront of some people. I find that I am a rather insecure person when it comes to peers close to my age. I can relate to people younger than myself and much older than myself, but when it comes to really getting into the nitty gritty with women near my age I hold back. This once again lead me to ponder "Why?" I mean I should be able to better relate to women near my current stage of life.... I soon came to the realization that women my age intimidate me. I often feel inadequate when dealing with women my age. I feel that I do not stand up in their eyes. I often wonder "am I pretty enough?" "do I act too young?" "Does what I say actually resinate and have meaning for others or is it just a release of hot air in the room?" "will I always be different?" When it comes to being with older women, I know that I will not measure up to the wisdom and experiences that they have had so I am safe; and with younger girls, I know that I can have fun and it doesn't matter if I live up to their standards. After all of this, I have learned that I do not need to measure up to anyone's standards except His. Scary as this may be, I am comforted in the fact that though His standards are the hardest to attain, He will ALWAYS forgive me of my shortcomings and love me as His BEAUTIFUL daughter.


Once I finished that thought process, I proceeded back to the verses only to realize that the toughest understanding was yet to be uncovered. If a person is sinning we are to "restore him gently." YIKES!! Not only did I realize that I do not really know that many people, I realized that for me to bring a sin to someone's eyes is that I do not want to be a hypocrite. Ouch! I know that personally I am not worthy of a task like that. I know I need to work on my heart and make sure it is in the right place before trying to do so in others. What a personally convicting message. I know that I often struggle to "choose" to spend alone time with my Father. There always seems to be so much more to do in the day, little do I realize that the only thing that I am to do is spend time with Father. As much as I grumble when sitting down to meet Him, I know that when I get up I am refreshed and have such a peace. Why do I not remember what He can give me when I am grumbling.


Well I have done alot of thinking and pondering this weekend and today. I have also left you with a lot to think about......Goodnight!


Kristi said...

I wish I had some wise words, but I don't. All I can say is that you are in no way alone. Thank you so much for being so sweet to share your heart. What beautiful thoughts you have put together that I can certainly relate to on so very many levels. Can't wait to get together!

David Dominguez said...

Thank you for these thought-provoking comments. You're right; those verses go a whole lot deeper than we might initially think.

Uganda Mission said... got me thinking! I also wanted to tell you though, that I try my hardest to not be judgemental and so I hope that our friendship can are a great friend and your words are wise! Thank you for sharing...